Create Balance in Your Life

Last July I golfed The Bog. A perfect day, I golfed one of my best games. Each drive was long and straight, the chips flawless, and I read the greens like a pro. I walked away believing, "Now, I've got it!"

The following week, beaver pelt divots flew longer than the ball, chips stormed over the greens and I'd swear there was no hole where the pin was sticking. I was back at square one.

Golf is like that. So is balance. Just when you think you have it all in balance, something happens; a new project, promotion, additional family member, illness or other demand that drives you back. At those times, it is helpful to remember the tenets for balance:

There are only 24 hours in a day. Sound elementary? It's not. How many times have you added something to your responsibilities without any thought of what can be discarded? Using magical thinking, you tell yourself it "won't be too bad" or with better organization "I can stretch those 24 hours." What usually happens is important activities, like sleep, get shortchanged, and equilibrium is tilted.
Sprinting only works for short distances. It is possible to push the extra mile for special projects or goals, but it doesn't work as a lifestyle. The reserves you have are slowly depleted and you are exhausted mentally and physically. A lifestyle of chronic sprinting results in chronic problems; migraines, back pain, heart disease or depression.
Engines need fuel. And so do you. The other side of the seesaw for balance is the activities you do to renew yourself; family, friends, exercise, and relaxation. Ironically, these are often the first things pushed aside when we get busy.

Successful people pay attention to their personal balance and make it a priority in their lives. Do you evaluate how you are spending your time and schedule the fuel on the other side of the seesaw? Or do you think about balance only when your 24 hours is stretch to the limit? At least once a week evaluate your current balance:

Rate the importance of each area of your life. Use a scale of 1-10 for each of the following areas; significant other, family/friends, career, money, health, personal growth, fun/recreation, and spiritual.
Rate the amount of time you spend in each area. Again, use the same scale of 1-10. Do the numbers match? Are you spending the time on the areas of your life you feel are most important? Is this a short-term snapshot or long-term lifestyle?

Doesn't look the same? Now don't immediately think of all the reasons it can't change. Remember, little change leads to big change. What changes could you make this week to get the numbers closer together? Don't tell me you don't have time, we all have the same amount, 24 hours per day. Use my rules of balance:

Never take something new on your plate, unless something else comes off. That is, unless you are totally bored and feel you have nothing to do. The request is from the boss? Ask, "Where does this fit into the other priorities? Do you want me to hold on that other project?"
Make your health a priority. Personal health is a non-renewable resource. How well you take care of yourself influences everything else, time with your family, career, finances and happiness.
Recognize your personal "TILT" warning. What are the early signs of overload you notice? Early morning wakening? Craving junk food? Loss of appetite? Re-evaluate your load when there are early signs, don't wait for exhaustion.

It is not the most intelligent or even the hardest working people who are most successful. It is those who can adjust to change and maintain balance. Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, "People with great gifts are easy to find, but symmetrical and balanced ones never."

Barbara Bartlein, R.N., M.S.W., is President of Great Lakes Consulting Group, LLC, which provides training and consultation to business. She can be reached at 888-747-9953, by e-mail at: barb@barbbartlein.com. or visit her website at www.WhyDidIMarryYouAnyway.com.

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